Luke Stewart

it's been confirmed

Sun, 02 Sep 2007 05:21:49 GMT

Camille came up this weekend, and it's definitly confirmed.
I am not gay.

Christmas is here

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 18:11:11 GMT

So here is the deal -
Camille said that we would not exchange presents this holiday season unless we did so over Hannukka, basically forcing me to celebrate Jewish holidays. I know she got me a TiVO and I really want it, but I don't know if I can give up Christ for a DVR.

REAL MEN MARRY DOCTORS

Mon, 23 Oct 2006 05:10:08 GMT

I plan on using this as my "in" to manhood.

Jeez

Tue, 17 Oct 2006 01:14:23 GMT

I would have NEVER told Camille this stuff if I knew that every word of it was going to be repeated on her blog.

But I do think it is important to point out that I was specifically NOT skipped. On anything. Ever.

Did I mention that Auburn is BCS ranks NUBMER 4?!!?

See.. I put that in to make it look like Luke writes this blog.

just in case y'all weren't sure -

Wed, 04 Oct 2006 05:24:29 GMT

I just wanted to throw out there what an extremely humble person I am.

My girlfriend claims to have "orbitofrontal lobe damage" and that is her "excuse" for her delusions of grandeur.
The point is, I'm way more humble.

There is nothing I love more...

Mon, 18 Sep 2006 21:51:35 GMT

than having Camille's mouth on my recently urinated wang...
Or as she'd say it, "dang" -- apparently that's the medical term for it.

CANCER!

Mon, 11 Sep 2006 00:43:12 GMT

CIGARETTS CAUSE CANCER

Mon, 11 Sep 2006 00:42:02 GMT

Today when I woke up, I had hot wings, potato chips, beer, and morning sex for breakfast. It was amazing.
You know what is specifically NOT amazing and actually, incredibly disgusting?

Teratomas.

Priapism

Tue, 29 Aug 2006 19:43:38 GMT

Ever since I heard Camille was coming in town for labor day, I've had the worst case of priapism.

name change?

Sat, 19 Aug 2006 02:06:17 GMT

Today Camille insisted I change my livejournal name to "LeukasAurelius" so that it would sound more like "leukocyte" "leukotriene" "leukemia" and "leukoblastosis" amongst other terms that mean absolutely nothing to me.

Patrick beat me

Sun, 13 Aug 2006 21:45:10 GMT

Yeah, I'm talking about the starfish on "Sponge-Bob Square Pants"
He had sex in my new apartment before I did.

Religious experience

Wed, 09 Aug 2006 03:05:52 GMT

Today I got a really bad headache while talking on the phone with Camille (imagine that!) and I casually said, I'm gonna take a Tylenol. Ol' girl started flipping out saying I was going to die if I took one and that she was a doctor and that she knew what she was talking about (I assume when she said "doctor" she actually meant "not a doctor"). I told her that I wouldn't, but when I got off the phone I did anyway and guess what - I'M STILL ALIVE.

I am taking my miraculous survival to mean that I am a "chosen person" and that I should convert to Judaism.

hotness to the max

Sun, 06 Aug 2006 19:34:48 GMT

For all of my New Orleans fans -
I am coming next weekend, specifically to see the word "cock" on Camille's leg.

I can't decide if I should go to New Orleans this weekend or not

Wed, 02 Aug 2006 18:22:20 GMT

It is a lot of driving, but damn, my woman has a rockin' bod.
Readers, help me make this decision. What is more important:
-Saving the environment by avoiding the burning of fossil fuels
-Getting ass-tons of ass

Camille is gorgeous and amazing

Mon, 31 Jul 2006 19:11:41 GMT

That is basically all I say to her all day every day. She does all the rest of the talking. God I miss banging at my parents house. I probably never will again now that I'm moving into my own apartment.

turns out I'm whipped

Mon, 24 Jul 2006 07:08:23 GMT

So, after extensive discussion, we finally came to the conclusion that I am completely controlled by the puntag; reference the filet I was forced to buy at Emril Lagasse's restaurant this weekend.

Camille's webcam

Thu, 20 Jul 2006 06:14:10 GMT

I think that I have died and gone to heaven where all the angels are sluts.

Fur panties out, waxing is in

Wed, 12 Jul 2006 00:08:29 GMT

This being said, Camille is very fashionable. What a great gal, enduring all that pain for me!

best quote of all eternity

Mon, 10 Jul 2006 19:02:37 GMT

"Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried."
-Paul Richard

mental exercises

Mon, 10 Jul 2006 18:35:17 GMT

Camille is coming up with my folks to Clarksville, TN this weekend. That gives me 5 days to mentally and physically prepare myself for her drunken insanity. I am doing this by carrying 50 lb. sacks of sand over my shoulder from the car to my bed, and by mentally rehearsing "maybe you should slow down" in various ways that sound sweet, yet very firm.

me, camille, and dizane

Sun, 09 Jul 2006 22:22:15 GMT

We all love headbutting and wanted France to lose.

my conversion

Sat, 08 Jul 2006 15:44:54 GMT

Last night I decided to convert to Judaism. I hope my friends and family understand that Camille is making me do it and that I still love Jesus no matter what.

Fri, 07 Jul 2006 17:25:08 GMT

two nights ago I had really awesome phone sex

hottness to the exxxtreme

Wed, 05 Jul 2006 22:41:59 GMT

God I just think banging Camille is the greatest thing on earth.